01 February 2010

Whatever He's Doing

I've always wanted to write a blog but I was never sure what I would write about or who would want to read it. Lately God has been speaking to my heart and calling me back to Him. I'll admit that for the past several years I have been trying to control my life and have been avoiding the realization and acceptance that my life is not my own. Still, amazingly, He has continued to bless my life and use those around me to help guide me and draw me closer to His love.

The title of this blog comes from a song by Sanctus Real. I really feel that the lyrics verbalize what is on my heart. I know God is working violently inside of me and I feel like I'm ready to surrender to whatever he's doing. I know I do not belong where I've built my life - and I'm giving it back to God. To be honest, I'm horribly scared and anxious to live out His plan. If you know me at all you know I have control issues. [Yes, I said it.. now let's move on..] But I trust that He will use this test to make me stronger and a better example of His love and the power and influence He can have in someones life. He's up to something bigger than all of us and I'm so excited to see what He's going to do and what He's begun.

I have been searching myself and am resolving to use this blog to open my heart and my life to God knowing that He will use it to speak to others. I ask that you pray for me and help keep me accountable to His word. And if God is speaking to you, please feel free to comment. I also would love nothing more than for you to share your story and your heart as well. I believe that God puts people in our lives to help teach us and to help us grow. We were never meant to keep our faith a secret, whether we feel we are strong or struggling. It's all a part of His plan.

So God, to whatever You're doing, I'm giving in. I'm so sorry for straying so far from You. You've always been home and I know You've always been there watching over me and loving me even when I wanted to pretend I didn't need You. Thank you for all of the wonderful friends You've placed in my life, help me to surround myself with a strong group of those who want to know You more. Thank you for my brother and sisters, help me to be an example to them. Thank you for two Godly parents who have not only shown me Your love but have reflected it in their love for each other. Thank you for blessing my life with a man who seeks Your heart, I ask that you continue to work within our relationship. Forgive me where I have wronged You, You've always been my first love. Give me the strength I need to put You first. Watch over me as I embark on this journey of becoming more like You. Amen.

Whatever You're Doing - Sanctus Real

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